Leaving your baby with a stranger…Things you shouldn’t say to a Working Mom

Let me preface this with….why can’t we all just get along?  We are all mothers, we are all trying to do what is best for our children! .

My dear friend Trish, a stay at home mom who writes at YOKE, and I have each made lists  of all the bizarre (yet way too common) comments we each get!  My list is complied from things that have been said to me (many times), as well as to many of my friends that work! 

1. You would rather work than stay home with your children?
2. I can’t believe you pay someone to take care of your kids rather than take care of them yourself
3. I can’t imagine leaving my baby with a stranger
4. I could never let someone else raise my children
5. He/She must be so sad all day missing you
6. Doesn’t it hurt to be away from your children so much?   Or how do you drop off your kids when they cry for you, doesn’t that bother you?
7. Do you know what you could do with the money you pay for daycare (hey dummy, if my kids weren’t in daycare I wouldn’t be working!)
8. My baby is just too attached to me that I couldn’t leave him. (Really and my baby hates me so it’s good that I send him/her to daycare)
9. I can’t imagine another woman hugging and kissing my baby all day (OUCH!)
10. Every mom owes it to their kids to be a stay-at-home mom. (I thought we owed them a good life)
11. Who cleans your house and does your yard?   (Answer: We do..ok well I personally have a cleaning lady every 2 weeks but come on I work and have 2 little kids)
12. Do you feel guilty about working?
13. Can’t you just work from home?
14. You’re going back to work ALREADY?? (maternity leave is 3 months so YES I work which means it’s time)
15. It must be nice to get a break and not have to “deal with” kids all day.  It’s like a vacation.
16. It’s much easier having to deal with grown up problems.  (How about having to deal with the sadness and aching pain in your heart on a daily basis because you miss your babies, is that easier)
17. You should stay home and find some kids to babysit. (why? So I can sit back and judge some *other* working mom like you?)
18. I could never put  my child on a “latchkey”
19. Dealing with a boss is way easier then dealing with a baby all day, plus you get to have adult conversation
20. I stay home because I did some soul searching and had to figure out what was really important (thanks, then can you pay my mortgage because I thought having shelter would be a good thing)
21. If you really wanted too, I’m sure you could make it work.  What does your husband do for a living? (I hear this all the time so now I am a bad mom because I “choose” to work and my husband is a bad dad because he can’t “provide” for his family)
22. Must be so nice to have your own money! (yes I work so I can buy Gucci and Prada, not to pay the bills)
23. Too bad you choose money over motherhood. Motherhood is much more rewarding.
24. You would be bored at home all day anyway!
25. Staying home is so much harder then working outside the home.  (Why dont you try working outside the home AND then try and spend quailty time with your child, clean the house, walk the dog, do the laundry, grocery shop, cook for your family, and sleep all in the same day!)
26. MY PERSONAL FAVORITE…….I don’t know HOW you do it!?! (I don’t know how I do it either, I must be SuperWoman because nobody else in the world works!)