When I got an email from Mom Bloggers for Social Good asking me to join their campaign with Save the Children to share my birth story I immediately thought OF COURSE!! As an advocate for the Preeclampsia Foundation I am constantly sharing my preeclampsia story in the hopes to raise more awareness. Then I thought a bit more about a story I never share, my first birth. OF COURSE!!! Why not share that……
My first pregnancy was…fine. I was not one of those women that loved being pregnant. I didn’t embrace the weight, I felt like a pig. I overate, I was hot, I had to pee all the time. And I was undoubtably a grumpy pregnant woman.
We didn’t find out the baby’s gender. It was our first baby, we wanted it to be a surprise. Two weeks late, 90 degrees out and finally I was brought in to be induced. Labor…over 20 hours, pushing 3 hours mixed with begging for a c-section, spiking a fever, neonatology called in for when the baby came out and then finally, “It’s a Boy” The most beautiful words I ever heard in my life. As I laid there exhausted and unable to move I watched my husband fumble to find our camera. It was that moment that I saw the most amazing thing I have ever witnessed in my life. I saw the exact moment my husband fell madly in love with our son. I saw the moment his life was forever changed and that the baby would always be the center of his universe.
As I laid there in my postpartum numbness I met Derek John. It felt so surreal, that this baby was mine. I knew right then why I existed. I knew then that my life on earth had a purpose and that was to be this baby’s mother. In one moment I felt so alive, so scared, nervous, anxious, excited, elated, exhausted and loved. It was the absolute best day of my entire life when I went from being me just me to being someone’s mother.
Although I didn’t love the birth experience or the pregnancy thing. I did, do and always will love being a mother. I love the kisses, cuddles, giggles, learning, teaching, trying, hopes, joys and more that come along with watching my children grow and helping guide them through the world.